Anti-porn again...

Well, I must've done something right, as it seems I've pissed someone off. Hehe :)

When I posted my most recent anti-porn post, I also posted a comment to the blog of the woman who believes it is her life's work to save other women from... yanno, themselves. I knew she wouldn't post the comment in her blog. Heaven forbid anyone entertain the idea that it is not only possible, but obvious, that many many intelligent, empowered women are now involved in the porn industry. Like Susie Bright. Or Annie Sprinkles. Violet Blue. Me! :) Well anyways, there are more than I can even mention here, women whom I respect and am so honored to be able to include myself in one of their numbers, even if I'm just a tiny little dot in a great big pond.

So, apparently this person came and checked out my blog here; I am not sure how, I don't recall having left my URL. Perhaps she looked up my IP address and cyberstalked me? I am not sure. Then went on over to my BDSM Blog, where, as my readers know, I write about much more intense BDSM fantasy type things. So, she left me a comment there. Which I suppose she thought I wouldn't post at all... and as a comment, I won't. But I will post it here, for your reading/viewing pleasure, with my responses to her. Her letter is in italics.

Who *hasn't* fantasized about being raped, sexually molested, tortured, or having their body mutilated?

Well, lot's of people, actually.

Wow, thanks for the newsflash.

Maybe if you weren't “chubby” you'd have better self-esteem and wouldn't take pleasure in being treated like shit. Nor would you encourage violence against women.

I am not sure how my weight is even relevant to the conversation, aside from an opportunity for a petty, small person to make a petty, small comment in an effort to make me feel bad about myself. Isn't that silly? Why would I feel badly because she can't think of something more intelligent to say than a snark at my weight?

As for wanting to be treated like shit... well, in a fantasy context, sometimes... sure. It's fun to enter a different reality where I can crawl and beg and be completely exposed and open and vulnerable.

In reality I'm a happily married woman who is spoiled rotten by an adorable, sexy husband, and is 32 weeks pregnant with a beautiful little girl. Do we do BDSM fantasy play? Yes, as part of cherishing each other. Is that outside your realm of understanding? Becuase that is ok with me. I didn't ask you to understand.

BTW, where or how have I EVER condoned or encouraged violence against women? There are few people in the universe you'd find more opposed to violence against women. Consensual BDSM is not violence against women. Anyone touching a woman in any way whatsoever without her consent, is violence against women and in my eyes, illegal and should be punished.

I know what you're thinking, but I'm not anti-sex or against all porn, just the abusive, violent kind, which seems to be on it’s way to being made illegal.

Lovely... so basically you support the government becoming more, not less, involved in our sex lives. Why not just move to a communist country and be done with it? Myself, I prefer freedom to choose what I will and will not do, and I don't need the government to tell me how to have sex. The problem here is that people who practice BDSM do not want or desire your "help" in determining what forms of sex or porn are abusive or violent. They are adults and are capable of making this decision for themselves.

And actually it is not the sexual repressed people who condemn S&M, but rather it is the sexually repressed who create it. Rape fantasies are even rooted in sexual repression.

OK. So how is it beneficial to repress those fantasies further??? When there are ways to express them safely and sanely?

Do some research, such as on religion and vows of celibacy. It’s not possible to suppress the human sex drive, it’s the most powerful biological urge, and trying to do so has some hefty consequences.

I agree.

Pain replacing pleasure being one of them. There needs to be a release, and when denied, other sensations, like pain, serve as a replacement.

Hahahahahahaha... I love the implication that I turned into a submissive because I wasn't HAVING ENOUGH SEX!!! That is hilarious. :) Actually, I was getting plenty at the time. It goes so much deeper than that. I laugh at people who tell me that BDSM is not about sex; for me, it is. But sexuality runs so deeply through the core of my being that considering it superficial truly is laughable.

Experiencing them creates a high or euphoria when they normally shouldn’t, and it’s not natural. Now you see that I’m actually more pro-sex than you because I think that sexual pleasure is fine the way it is and doesn’t need to be channeled else where unnaturally. As sexually liberated as you people think you are, you’re not. You’re in modern day biblical times right up there with Catholic priests.

Ummmm... ok, that is not very logical, but whatever floats your boat. Catholic priests??? LOL! BTW endorphins are wonderful, but if it were only about endorphins, I could go for a jog and get the same experience. I'm sorry your understanding of these experiences are so shallow.

It’s not in me to talk a lot of shit anonymously. Have a good one! You're a lost cause.

Ah, the witty, parting and oh so petty shot.

Yes, this makes you seem truly intelligent and thoughtful. Going from "you're chubby" to "you're a lost cause." Wow. Thanks!!!! :)

Now see if you can understand this. If you don't like BDSM or porn, that is your right. If you want to tell people why, that is entirely your right. But if you want to control the way other people have sex, you've got issues. It's really none of your business.

Now of course in some ways I make my sex life the business of others who are welcome to comment... but control? I'm sorry, no. You also have the option to simply not read, or partake of, anything which you find offensive. There are plenty of things in the universe I find offensive or don't enjoy, and I don't look at those things. That is what freedom is all about.

I will not, however, prohibit or support any type of prohibition on any form of consensual sex. To do so takes choices away from people, implies that they need you (or the government) to guide them in their sex lives, and leads to a level of government intervention in private affairs which I find completely abhorrent and unacceptable.

As for the porn industry as a whole, I'm enjoying being part of changing it from within in whatever small way I can. I love being one of the many, many web women out there who are empowered and in control of their sexuality, and I suppose that at the very least, if we are pissing off people like this one, maybe we're somehow stretching their brains a tiny, tiny bit. We have to start somewhere!

So, Tamara....

Just how pregnant are you?

31 weeks... :)

Anti-porn again...

There's nothing like a little sip of anti-porn in the morning to get my day started with a bang! I just loooooooooove it when some self-described feminist believes it is her lifes mission to save me and all the other poor little female lambs of the world from the big bad wolf of porn.

Seriously, do they not GET how condescending that is?

Not to mention the very, very obvious fact that in any large group of people you are going to have some bad, some good, some average. I will be the first to admit that the porn industry, especially the very commercialized segments of it, has lots of bad in it.

Like the guy who wanted to hire me for a movie once and told me it didn't matter if I liked it or not. "We work with girls who don't like it all the time!" Yeah, LOL, that was meant to be reassuring to me when all it did was piss me off. Or like the very few men I've met in my line of work as an escort who very obviously don't care about women at all. I had one guy tell me he didn't want his wife to masturbate... EVER! Hmph. (Though I guess he is not in the porn industry, I am!) That pissed me off too. But I never saw him again. A negative person might make it through my screening once; they won't get through twice. Because, yanno, *I* am in control.

To make up for it, the majority of men I've met have been amazing. Such a huge variety of people and while most of them might not at first understand the idea of a woman choosing to explore her sexuality in such a way, they are usually open to hearing about it and learning and opening their minds to all the possibilities of the universe... which is much, much more than I can say for some anti-porn people!

But, anyways. The porn industry also has lots of good in it, especially with the advent of the Internet and all the amazing, independant, strong, intelligent web women who are running their own sites, controlling their own porn, exploring their own sexuality on their own terms. Of whom I am one, darn it! Not to mention all the new porn related companies which have started with a sex positive theme. I mean, Toys in Babeland! Good Vibrations! Susie Bright! There are *so* many amazing, strong women in this industry and it just really gets my lack of panties in a snit to see them denigrated as being "bad" for women and children.

The thing these anti-porn people fail to grasp is that taking choices away from people is never, never a way to make them more free. Taking online gambling away from Americans won't make us more free, it makes us oppressed and treated like children who cannot think for ourselves. Taking porn away from people does the same thing. And for every study out there showing how bad porn is for the world, I would be willing to bet I can find you one showing how good it is or at least, how it doesn't make a difference. There's a study or statistic out there to prove any point you want to make.

I believe that people, especially women, are empowered through making choices for themselves. If porn squicks them out and they don't want it; they don't need to see it. If they love porn and masturbate to it daily... more power to them! And all shades of grey in between.

I'm not going to link to the site that got me all huffy and puffy this morning... that chick doesn't need the extra traffic anyways. I just wanted to rant! I have a lot of rants on my mind lately, so be prepared... ;)

Questions about circumcision...

Being a pregnant mama-to-be introduces you to all kinds of things you really never even thought of before... like, *should* we circumcise baby boys? Frankly I'm torn on this issue... being someone who's had lots of sex with lots of different people, I've been exposed to many different types of penises. *sigh* Fun, to think of them all, really!!!!



But in my *personal* experience, the majority of men I've been with who are uncircumcised, had a very difficult time with condom use. A few men had foreskins that were so sensitive, that to move them AT ALL caused excruciating pain... which, of course, makes putting a condom on almost impossible. Some you were able to get the condom on, but then the poor guy would lose his erection because, yanno, it hurt! Some you'd get the condom on and then it would slide around wierd and get bunched up inside of me, which is very very uncomfy for me. And a few I remember that were able to put the condom on correctly, with the foreskin pulled *back*, wound up with the condom stuck to the head of their very sensitive penis afterwards. Even with lube. And still got that crazy bunching around problem.

This is *my* personal experience.

So I have been pondering this and thinking that maybe it's just that I am not experienced enough with foreskins and I've been doing something wrong the whole darned time. Or maybe this is something many uncut men deal with? Both are definite possibilities... let's face it, condoms were made for circumcised cocks! I am also wondering if, if you buy the type of condom with tons of super extra headroom, those would be better for foreskins?

I am really just curious about all of this, and would love to hear from you... both cut and uncut... and from women who've been with either and/or both type of men! My position on this right now is that we should *not*, circumcise baby boys, as it seems many circumcisions at that age are totally botched. Plus if a man wants to, he can certainly *choose* to have it done, by a good plastic surgeon/urologist, when he is old enough to. I throw that out there for the record and so that no anti-circ activists try to slaughter me for this post. (No slaughtering, please!) The reality is that whatever you feel, an uncut cock has different needs than a cut cock, and I don't think talking about that difference and figuring out how best to address it is in any way wrong.

Doesn't matter for me right now though, I am having a girl! :)

Deny, deny, deny...

So I guess the real question about the whole Mark Foley thing is not, how many "naughty" emails and/or IMs to underage kids did he send out, but how many did he actually follow up with real physical contact? Think we'll ever know?

I refuse to believe that this man has known he is gay his whole (political) life, has had a reputation for "indiscreet" behavior for so many years, and has NEVER actually followed it up. Just doesn't make sense! Regardless...

How many corrupt Republicans have to be unearthed before people recognize and realize that the party which spews hatred at homosexuals, spouts nonsense about ineffective and misleading abstinence-only education for our kids, proclaims daily about their God-fearing church-abiding-ness, rolls around on the platform of their "family values", and continues to hammer home "stay the course" in Iraq when NONE of their kids are there.... Is TOTALLY full of crap? I mean come on!

This party is full of gays hiding in the closet, sleeping around on their wives, having abortions, hiding their kids from military service, stealing money from Americans, and of course... lying, lying, lying!

I hope the Dems take the opportunity here to come out and come out HARD and with some good messages... they are usually so frickin' convoluted in their speech and slogans that no one can figure out what the heck they are talking about anyways. I would prefer that they win based on substance, vs. than by default because the Republicans have literally become SO horrible that most thinking Americans cannot possibly vote for them anymore.

Ok, ok... here's an article about Foley that sparked my tirade for your perusal! (Salon usually requires you watch a short ad to gain access to their site for the day!) I especially enjoyed Foley's quote about the Clinton scandal. And speaking of cover-ups and denial, check out Keith Olbermann's coverage of Fox trying to pass Foley off as a Democrat. Hilarious!!!! Apparently other news outlets have followed the trend! Who do they think they are kidding?!?!

YUM to Keith Olbermann. You know I'm a political geek when I lust after people like Keith Olbermann, Jon Stewart, and Stephen Colbert. Yowza!!! ;)

And now back to our regularly scheduled porn!

So horny...

I wonder if this is typical 7 month phenomenon... to be so horny! Although truth be told, I've been horny pretty much throughout... and having all kinds of unusually detailed and dirty fantasies. For those of you who like your sex on the kinky side, check out my post over at my Bondage Blog... I've written down several of my own fantasies based on some hot, hot, HOT pics from Sex & Submission. And what the heck, here is one more hot pic...

I mean obviously this pic is hot, it goes without saying! But what I love about it, is how hard he is grinding that hitachi into her tiny little pussy. You can see her pussy lip sort of shmooshed, and the look on her face is perfect... perfectly lost in the valley of pleasure and pain. Yum! Anyways if you'd like to see some more, click here for my Bondage Blog!

Jackass...

I can admit when I'm wrong, at least... sometimes... I have to say I was totally offended when I saw the previews for Jackass using a supersized BBW to jump onto some tiny guy. Of course you only see it for a second in the preview, but... ugh, I thought to myself... more fat jokes, how original!

Apparently there is more to it than that, anyways... check out Steve-O's kick ass tattoo! Also, the lady featured in the movie has a much more positive view of it than I did from that preview... here she is!

I guess I was wrong! I still don't think I'll see the movie, though... I didn't see the first one either... just looks so painful! Unless there are amazing recommendations by my viewers, I think I'll skip it. But, still, kewl tatt!

Fluffy, horny girl...

Hooker power!

I knew it all along. Forcing hookers to have sex with you just doesn't pay. Click here for the article :)