Anti-porn again...

Well, I must've done something right, as it seems I've pissed someone off. Hehe :)

When I posted my most recent anti-porn post, I also posted a comment to the blog of the woman who believes it is her life's work to save other women from... yanno, themselves. I knew she wouldn't post the comment in her blog. Heaven forbid anyone entertain the idea that it is not only possible, but obvious, that many many intelligent, empowered women are now involved in the porn industry. Like Susie Bright. Or Annie Sprinkles. Violet Blue. Me! :) Well anyways, there are more than I can even mention here, women whom I respect and am so honored to be able to include myself in one of their numbers, even if I'm just a tiny little dot in a great big pond.

So, apparently this person came and checked out my blog here; I am not sure how, I don't recall having left my URL. Perhaps she looked up my IP address and cyberstalked me? I am not sure. Then went on over to my BDSM Blog, where, as my readers know, I write about much more intense BDSM fantasy type things. So, she left me a comment there. Which I suppose she thought I wouldn't post at all... and as a comment, I won't. But I will post it here, for your reading/viewing pleasure, with my responses to her. Her letter is in italics.

Who *hasn't* fantasized about being raped, sexually molested, tortured, or having their body mutilated?

Well, lot's of people, actually.

Wow, thanks for the newsflash.

Maybe if you weren't “chubby” you'd have better self-esteem and wouldn't take pleasure in being treated like shit. Nor would you encourage violence against women.

I am not sure how my weight is even relevant to the conversation, aside from an opportunity for a petty, small person to make a petty, small comment in an effort to make me feel bad about myself. Isn't that silly? Why would I feel badly because she can't think of something more intelligent to say than a snark at my weight?

As for wanting to be treated like shit... well, in a fantasy context, sometimes... sure. It's fun to enter a different reality where I can crawl and beg and be completely exposed and open and vulnerable.

In reality I'm a happily married woman who is spoiled rotten by an adorable, sexy husband, and is 32 weeks pregnant with a beautiful little girl. Do we do BDSM fantasy play? Yes, as part of cherishing each other. Is that outside your realm of understanding? Becuase that is ok with me. I didn't ask you to understand.

BTW, where or how have I EVER condoned or encouraged violence against women? There are few people in the universe you'd find more opposed to violence against women. Consensual BDSM is not violence against women. Anyone touching a woman in any way whatsoever without her consent, is violence against women and in my eyes, illegal and should be punished.

I know what you're thinking, but I'm not anti-sex or against all porn, just the abusive, violent kind, which seems to be on it’s way to being made illegal.

Lovely... so basically you support the government becoming more, not less, involved in our sex lives. Why not just move to a communist country and be done with it? Myself, I prefer freedom to choose what I will and will not do, and I don't need the government to tell me how to have sex. The problem here is that people who practice BDSM do not want or desire your "help" in determining what forms of sex or porn are abusive or violent. They are adults and are capable of making this decision for themselves.

And actually it is not the sexual repressed people who condemn S&M, but rather it is the sexually repressed who create it. Rape fantasies are even rooted in sexual repression.

OK. So how is it beneficial to repress those fantasies further??? When there are ways to express them safely and sanely?

Do some research, such as on religion and vows of celibacy. It’s not possible to suppress the human sex drive, it’s the most powerful biological urge, and trying to do so has some hefty consequences.

I agree.

Pain replacing pleasure being one of them. There needs to be a release, and when denied, other sensations, like pain, serve as a replacement.

Hahahahahahaha... I love the implication that I turned into a submissive because I wasn't HAVING ENOUGH SEX!!! That is hilarious. :) Actually, I was getting plenty at the time. It goes so much deeper than that. I laugh at people who tell me that BDSM is not about sex; for me, it is. But sexuality runs so deeply through the core of my being that considering it superficial truly is laughable.

Experiencing them creates a high or euphoria when they normally shouldn’t, and it’s not natural. Now you see that I’m actually more pro-sex than you because I think that sexual pleasure is fine the way it is and doesn’t need to be channeled else where unnaturally. As sexually liberated as you people think you are, you’re not. You’re in modern day biblical times right up there with Catholic priests.

Ummmm... ok, that is not very logical, but whatever floats your boat. Catholic priests??? LOL! BTW endorphins are wonderful, but if it were only about endorphins, I could go for a jog and get the same experience. I'm sorry your understanding of these experiences are so shallow.

It’s not in me to talk a lot of shit anonymously. Have a good one! You're a lost cause.

Ah, the witty, parting and oh so petty shot.

Yes, this makes you seem truly intelligent and thoughtful. Going from "you're chubby" to "you're a lost cause." Wow. Thanks!!!! :)

Now see if you can understand this. If you don't like BDSM or porn, that is your right. If you want to tell people why, that is entirely your right. But if you want to control the way other people have sex, you've got issues. It's really none of your business.

Now of course in some ways I make my sex life the business of others who are welcome to comment... but control? I'm sorry, no. You also have the option to simply not read, or partake of, anything which you find offensive. There are plenty of things in the universe I find offensive or don't enjoy, and I don't look at those things. That is what freedom is all about.

I will not, however, prohibit or support any type of prohibition on any form of consensual sex. To do so takes choices away from people, implies that they need you (or the government) to guide them in their sex lives, and leads to a level of government intervention in private affairs which I find completely abhorrent and unacceptable.

As for the porn industry as a whole, I'm enjoying being part of changing it from within in whatever small way I can. I love being one of the many, many web women out there who are empowered and in control of their sexuality, and I suppose that at the very least, if we are pissing off people like this one, maybe we're somehow stretching their brains a tiny, tiny bit. We have to start somewhere!